Friday, May 11, 2018

Here's Some Art


Rubber Ducks and Surgery

My freshman year is almost over! I have seven days left. Today was the last day for the seniors, which means today was SENIOR PRANK DAY! This year, the seniors filled the fountain in the courtyard with squeaky rubber ducks. Almost everyone in the school had some, and we were squeaking them all day. The assistant principal (let's call him Mr. Fox), who has NO sense of humor, was super pissed off about all the rubber ducks, so he went though to almost every class with a trash can demanding that people turn in their ducks. A lot of people didn't though- one girl would stick her hand in her purse and squeak her duck whenever Mr. Fox walked by, and he'd freak out but never realize it was her. It was really funny to watch Mr. Fox get so angry about rubber ducks- when he walked into the lunch room, everyone immediately started tossing them around, and he yelled at us for a solid minute or two, but it's hard to take a guy seriously when he's yelling about rubber ducks.

My science teacher this year is a little nuts. Ok, she's really nuts- she blew up 34 toilets her senior year in high school because she should have been valedictorian, but wasn't (because she was from out of town). Her lab is a mess- there are mountains of dirty lab equipment on her counters, she has a tank of dead fish, and her shelves are lined with jars of dead things. Today, I went to ask her a question and saw she was watching a video of a surgery. I joked, "Is this how you how you spend your free time?", and she responded, very enthusiastically, that yes, she just LOVES watching surgeries, and her favorites are vasectomies and reverse vasectomies. She then pulled up a new video (of an umbilical hernia being repaired) and had me watch it with her. It was actually really interesting, but the best part was that my teacher would LAUGH and make comments like "They just pushed his belly button back in! Pop!". One time, a guy in my class, Davy, wasn't at school because he was being operated on. Someone asked what happened to him, and the science teacher didn't hesitate to project a diagram of the testicles onto the whiteboard and explain, in detail, exactly what was wrong with Davy's testicles and how the problem was being fixed.

I hope I have her for biology next year.